The Great Gran Fondo Is Oh So Close

Who - The NECS/MRC (duh)

What - Gran Fondo, the grandest of the fondos

When - Sunday 5/26, roll out at 8:30am

Where - NECS/MRC Corporate Headquarters (668 Sand Hill Rd, Gardiner)

How - By registering through the comments section of this blog (bring friends) and applying superior translation skills

Why - Because this is THE original NECS/MRC non race event


Yes it is a scant 26 days until the non racing event of the season takes place - The NECS/MRC Gran Fondo. While Gran Fondoing is the newest rage to sweep the cycling community the NECS/MRC have been putting on this event since the days when lugged frame steel bikes were the only legal ride on the UCI circuit. Yes you will find Fondos featuring catchy write ups like this -


Campagnolo Gran Fondo New York is a 100-mile cycling challenge for 7,000 riders from over 70 countries on May 19, 2013. Closed roads and roads with police moderated traffic provide the platform for athletes who love to race, go for a personal best or finish before the cutoff time. The race starts in NYC on the most travelled bridge in the world, George Washington Bridge, closed to cars just for you. It travels north to beautiful Bear Mountain State Park and finishes after 100 miles and 7000ft of climbing in Weehawken, NJ facing the spectacular NYC skyline. (I mean seriously, we put in this much climbing in half the distance on the Bear Mountain Beatdown)


or this

The organization of Gran Fondo Giro d’Italia is managed by RCS Sport. RCS Sport is also the organizer of Giro d’Italia.RCS Sport is aware that, investing in sport today means speak to millions of people, fans, and athletes. This calls for an effective and emotional language able to catalyse all media, reach different targets, and build strong networks.Sport is a powerful medium. RCS Sport translates the energy of sport into business. (WTF, the MRC translates the energy of sport into a party)

but you will never find a Gran Fondo with more fun than this one. Unlike in past years where we braved pouring rain and blazing heat to conquer the summits of Peakamoose and Minnewaska to win the sacred KOM jersey this year it will be the kinder and gentler Gran Fondo. But don't be fooled, you had better bring your A game when it comes to sprinting because we will not be short on excitement as the argy bargy picks up for each of the 3 intermediate sprints with points (6, 4 & 2) for first (plus a large format beer), second and third. The action culminates in a final sprint carrying double points with the overall THC points classification winner taking home the Gran Fondo growler. Back at the HQ there will be the traditional post race BBQ and alcohol consumption that only those of superior state of mind and superior attitude should be ready to attend.

Line up, sign up and reenlist today because we need more schooling for more education for More Science High!

Gran Fondo 26/5

Shocking isn't it how time flies when you are non racing. It seems like only yesterday that the Bear Mountain Beatdown was in the books but now get your chamois all hot and sweaty because it is Gran Fondo time! Sure there are bigger ones, ones with bigger stars and of course ones that cost a shitload more and offer a shitload less but one thing is for sure, none of them will offer the great time that past NECS Gran Fondos have (2011 & 2012).
Once again, for a measly six pack (or if you are feeling big a bottle of Tequila) you will be guided by the MRC board of directors around Ulster and Sullivan counties on some of our most cherished and secretive courses. This year instead of really putting the wood to with unrelenting climb after climb and a coup de grace up to Minnewaska parking lot we are offering a kinder and gentler Gran Fondo that will be littered with sprint points for the traditional growlers.
Stay tuned for more updates!

Time To Get Dirty (Century) Again

Right now I am sitting on the couch with a pile of snot rags and a sore, raw nose all the result of the infamous Bear Mountain Beatdown. Waiting at the top of Bear Mountain in the wind for 20+ minutes while John plied the Palisades Parkway in search of Woodbury Commons didn't help, but time to harden the f*#k up and get on with it.

Having sworn off the racing circuit doesn't mean one can't non race a race, which is what I fully intend to do at this year's Wildcat 100. I mean really, how can you pass up a NUE Series race when the start is 20 minutes from your house and the course gives you a bailout point less then a mile from home and a man cave full of IPAs. Being careful to protect the immune system from another round of Lyme's I have opted for the sit on the couch and eat bon bons training program but to make things really interesting I am going to let you, the esteemed well educated (compliments of this blog) cyclist vote for my non race ride for the event (a no I won't ride a f*#kin' TT bike, I just want to see how many jerks pick it) and you have the option to make multiple selections.

And with that I present the options -

Wrist Snapping Singlespeed

Tried & True Race Hardtail

Cx Madness

TT Bike

Billy's Mom

Beaten But Not Down

The MRC/NECS non race season has officially started with the Bear Mountain Beatdown in the books. With the Amy Freeze inspired forecast calling for mid 40s with morning showers (of the non-golden variety) giving way to mostly cloudy skies there was a strong chance that only the most hardened of the troops would muster for the call to battle. It was a clear signal participation would be light when the CDC arrived at the staging area looking to quarantine the group due to a severe case of Manginaitis sweeping the Orange County riding community. When presented with the our therapeutic use exemption (TUE) for Rifmancyclene the boys in the NBC Protective Suits put in the call to Pat McQuaid who officially signed off on the events UCI sanctioning.

Making the grade were El Obamador, C-Dubbs, Senor “if there’s beer at the end of the ride I’m in” Agua, Brian and John. For those that have paid attention to the ramblings of this venue of superior attitude and superior state of mind you are well versed in the antics of the 3 amigos but need to understand the mindset it takes to ride the Beatdown. Brian, along with El Obamador make up the Marine contingent of the group and you know El O has the ability to withstand hardships (Wilderness 101/Dark Horse 40 weekend of racing) but Brian, well he is a whole other animal. With temps hovering the the low 40s, damp/raw conditions and a good strong gusty wind out of the northwest that had us all slathered in embrocation and warm clothing this is how Brian rolls –

Rolling out of town we were cheered on by the masses lining the street of Cornwall

Before plunging down the descent to the Hudson River. Here we make the traditional stop to wave our manhood at the passing watercraft.

Brain running from our massive one-eyed trouser trouts

And this stop is critical for shedding every last gram of weight as just down the road is the sharp right onto Lower Mountain Road/Boulevard/Maple and the never ending, lung searing grinder to the summit at Storm King School (one of those fine private institutes of academia that welcome with open arms the offspring of Mercedes driving parents). Moving with the trend to gravel road riding El Obamador swapped the double climb/descent on 9W for a section through the  Black Rock Forest.

Our version of the Strade Bianchi included multiple stretches of Item #4 quality gravel that assured one of a taint massage like only Criss Angel would happily offer.

At the summit, in the middle of nowhere, we came across this unlikely pair from the fine Borough of Queens (yes the same place Prince Akeem sought out his queen) doing maintenance on a Carbon Flux Capacitator. The first question they asked – “are you riding 23s?” (seriously we can’t make this shit up).

Surviving a downhill section better suited to a mountain bike (John was truly feeling at ease here) it was time for a pair of high speed winding descents to the town of Fort Montgomery where speeds topped 45mph. The big smiles at the bottom soon turned to looks of suffering as the Bear Mountain summit lay ahead.  At the base Senor Agua, El Obamador, Brian and C-Dubbs set off to inflict maximum pain while John smartly held back to conserve for the later half of the ride. The turn on to Jenkins saw Senor Agua and C-Dubbs off the back with Brian finally popping near the summit.

After regrouping at the summit, enjoying the view for awhile we realized John was MIA.

Quick call and it was confirmed, John had been sniffing Jenkem on the lower slopes, missed the turn onto Jenkins and was now well on his way to Woodbury Commons for some outlet mall shopping. We saddled up, tore ass down the upper slopes of Bear Mountain before jumping onto the Palisades Parkway and a big grinding climb up Route 6 that greeted up with a strong headwind. Here C-Dubbs did a spectacular impersonation of a lamprey

riding El Obamador’s wheel to the summit and ensuing descent into the US Military Academy at West Point where we encountered troop movement exercises and army grunts coming out of the woods in full battle gear and firearms.

A quick salute to our comrades and we continued the high speed descent through the gates of the academy and onto Storm King Highway.

Normally at this point everyone gives a high five as the climbing is over and it is a fast run to town and a well deserved beer. This time, just to make sure you got the beatdown you signed up for, another climb to the Storm King School was served up, but this time it was straight up Mountain Road. This has to be about a 2 mile climb that is littered with sections (and not short ones) hitting close to 20 degrees. Brian “I’m so tough I eat glass for breakfast” crushed all comers, C-Dubbs (even with a brief rest in a driveway) managed to eek out second with Senor Agua and El Obamador carrying on a casual conversation the entire climb. John, well being new to the road was hitting PRs for distance and climbing, summited with a big shit eating grin.

At this point there was near mutiny when El Obamador suggested we head back down via Maple/Boulevard which included yet another short steep section that was sure to hurt the vertically challenged. Instead we opted to race the cars down 9W where cars were blowing by at 50-60 while we were in the mid 40s. Taking the exit at the bottom we arrived back at the parking lot with warm temps, sunny skies and the appropriate post ride beer that summed up the day.

At the post non race lunch we contemplated over burgers, pulled pork sandwiches and double IPAs how our superior attitude/superior state of mind and ability to harden the f*#k up helped up survive. If you missed this, next up is Gran Fondo on Memorial Day weekend. Stay tuned.

Get Ready For Your Beatdown

It's just a few days away and after all that climbing which one will you be?

Who, What, When, Where, Why

Who - The MRC/NECS, who the f*#k else would host something as phenomenal as this!
What - The Bear Mountain Breakdown
When - 4/20 DUH! 9:00am
Where - D&D parking lot - 45 Quaker Ave Cornwell, NY
Why - Why Not? Bring friends, the more the merrier

Are You Ready To Take A Beating

Yes indeed my good friends and active participants in the exciting exploits of the MRC/NECS, spring is in the air, hormones are raging and the girls are showing their best. With the cherry blossoms coming out so to does the MRC/NECS Non Race Series kick off, and what better way to start the non season than with the infamous El Obamador organized Bear Mountain Beatdown.

Yes the ride will hurt, more then this -

and deep down, inside, you know this is just what you want, a good hurtful session with the rivet massaging your prostate as you struggle up the multiple ascents of the West Point region. To really make our season opening event a true MRC/NECS inspired ride we have carefully selected the date, 4/20, to honor the high priest of ancient Chinese scripture translation and allow everyone a day to recover before going back to the daily grind at the office.

Stay tuned for additional details on non start time and non race location, until then enjoy a few of the shots from last year's beating.